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“It makes it seem like there’s a dialogue going on from the very beginning,” he said. “Dialogue rather than just messaging.” At first, Maltempo’s wife, Xue Jiang, was unimpressed by his messages. A little over a year later, Maltempo married a woman he met on the site.

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In the process, Montecillo, 25, also learned to not judge himself based on others people’s standards.Alan Montecillo logged on to Ok Cupid and started filling out his profile.He wrote down his height (6 feet), listed his interests (podcasts, basketball, reading) and included photos of himself outdoors.Maltempo says women occasionally made assumptions about him based on his race.“When [I was] dating non-Asians, sometimes they were interested in exotic factors that I’m not a white guy,” he said.

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